Don't Go
by sureynot
Summary: RWHG a long flashback showing what incidents occured before Ronald Weasley's suicide attempt
1. Lost

Disclaimer: I don't own anything, just don't sue me.  
  
Gashes and scars engulfed his body. The only sound that was heard was the faint ticking of a clock. No amount of magic could fix what was done to his mental and physical stability. His breath was running short and his once deep and glimmering eyes were fading. His body wanted him to scream out. Even if he did no one would ever hear him in the room of Requirement. No scream came.  
He wanted this, it would be over soon. Nothing to worry about now. I won't be in anyone's way now. They can get on without me. They certainly show it. He couldn't tell whether his blood or tears was flowing out of him faster.  
Even before the knife pierced his skin, he was in pain. This pain never left him. It haunted him, in his dreams. That's why he made sure he was always busy before this. If he didn't have anything to do, the pain would creep up on him and attack him from the inside. Scars, inside and out, covered him. He cut because it made him, even if for a moment, forget the pain inside him, the pain which was much worse.  
The will to eat, sleep, and live was gone. He was wasting away, slowly. It was like torture. Everyday he endured. All of his friends drifted away, even his most trusted and valuable. He was alone. Death was his only answer.  
For the first time he spoke out. "I'm done with it, life, everything." The shallow pool of blood beside him was slowly growing thicker. He began slipping in and out of consciousness, until finally fading into black.  
  
Flashback  
Hermoine walked into the grand hall with her head, as usual, stuck in a book. He watched her, the way she moved, the way she turned the pages of her delicate book, and the way she noticed nothing when she was reading, all of these, intrigued him. He sat behind a quidditch book while pretending to read.  
He felt guilty when he did this. 'It's like I'm obsessed with her!' he would think each time he stole a glance at her. And each time she never noticed, she was still engrossed in her book.  
Harry noticed though. "You and I both know, that you would be lucky to have each other mate." Ron jumped back, startled and fell off his chair. Harry laughed and this brought Hermoine back into reality.  
Ron mumbled, "I... just tripped over the chair."  
"Honestly, you should really be more careful. You could have seriously injured yourself. I mean if you had only watched were you were......" Hermione continued, but neither Harry or Ron ended up listening to the rest of it.  
"Hermione, just drop it ok?" Ron piped. Hermione stalked off, and gave an insulted sigh as she did.  
'Great Ron, just great, screw up another chance with Hermione. She'll never know how I feel.' So right he was.  
  
End Flashback  
  
Review Please. That's all I ask. 


	2. Blooming

Hi Everybody! I'm really sorry my first chappie was so short, so maybe this one will make up for it.  
  
Disclaimer: I know I don't own them, you know I don't own them, my cat knows I don't own them, so what's the point of writing it?  
  
Everyone was crammed into a small room in St. Mungos; Mrs. Weasley was sitting right next to Ron's bed, silently weeping. Ginny was trying to console Mr. Weasley, for whom tears were not enough. He just stood by Ron's bed, his eyes focused on a large cut on Ron's upper for-arm. Percy, Bill, and Charlie were sitting together in a small circle they made with their chairs. Fred and George stood quietly at the edge of their youngest brothers bed. Both of their eyes had welled up with tears, but not a single drop was spilled. Hermoine and Harry were sitting in chairs on opposite sides of the rooms. Hermoine was crying into her hands and Harry watched the Weasley clan mourn.

Both met each others gaze, and then quickly dropped their heads. Both Mr. and Mrs. Weasley were guided out of the room by Ginny, who was holding her tears back only for her parents confidence, followed by the rest of the Weasley clan. Hermoine and Harry lingered by Ron's bed. Hermoine was the first to speak. "I'm so sorry Ron, I'll never forgive myself if... what happened... is permanent. I know it. It's my fault. I'm sure of it." in an inaudible whisper. Hermoine dropped her head into a bow.  
Harry looked directly at Ron's face and spoke. "Come on mate, you can get through this. You've gotten through tougher stuff before. Remember the huge chess set, the Womping Willow, the dementors; you've through it all with me. I don't want to go through anything like that alone. Stay here. We need you here, now. I need you here. I couldn't imagine going through any faze of my life without you right there with me."  
Harry stepped back away from the bed and Hermoine moved towards it again and again she spoke in a whisper. "Ron," she said as a single, solitary tear dropped from her face, "I love you."  
  
_A/n: this flashback is REALLY long because I have to explain what happened before this, so it might be a couple chapters.  
  
Flashback  
"Ron, hey Ron! Wait up!" Harry called out.  
"Come on Harry, you're gonna make us late for Transfiguration, again!" Hermoine was walking quickly and was already at the Transfiguration door talking to Prof. Mcgonagall when she cried out.  
"I don't believe it!"  
"Miss Granger! Keep your voice down. Prof. Dumbledore and the House teachers have all agreed on this. And no matter how many temper tantrums the students may throw, you are going to work harmoniously with your peers. Now please, Miss Granger, read the board and sit where I have assigned you," said Prof Mcgonagall curtly. "Oh, and Mr. Finnegan, do not do that to the cat, I'm sure it does not appreciate it," she added.  
"Oi, Hermoine, what was that all about?" Ron asked.  
"Why don't you go see for yourself?" Hermoine snapped. Ron and Harry soon found out why Hermoine was angry. In Prof. Mcgonagall's perfect cursive, the Board read:  
  
In order to bring House relations closer together, the faculty, including myself, has agreed on pushing the matter. We feel we must do this, and we know, you may not like others from different houses, but you will respect them. To do this we will have new seating charts in all classrooms, you will sit next to someone of a different House. For the rest of the year  
you will sit beside the person next to you on the seating chart.  
  
Ernie Mcmillian; Ronald Weasley_

_ Lisa Turpin; Dean Thomas_

_ Blaise Zambini; Terry Boot _

_Lavender Brown; Millicent Bulstrode _

_Hannah Abbott; Neville Longbottum_

_ Vincent Crabbe; Parvarti Patil_

_ Pansy Parkinson; Harry Potter _

_Gregory Goyle; Seamus Finnigan_

_ Mandy Brocklehurst; Justin FinchFletchley_

_ Draco Malfoy; Hermoine Granger  
  
"I don't believe it! Hermoine you have to sit by... Malfoy! That little scumbag! Just tell us, Hermoine if he does anything out of line we'll pound him to a pulp!" said an enraged Ron. Harry stood by and nodded in anger.  
"Well thank you Ron, but know very well that I can stand my own ground around Malfoy. Remember that slap in third year?" Hermoine said confidently.  
"How could I forget? It's still the best day in history, besides maybe the ferret incident." Ron smiled fondly. "Ugg! Harry you have to sit by Pansy Parkinson, I think she's the girl that hangs out with Malfoy all the time."  
"That cow! She's a complete cow. You know one time I'd like to get her alone and then I'd..."  
"Hey guys," Neville said, "I have to sit by Hannah, but that's ok, she's smart maybe she can help me with my Transfiguration. Oh, yea, Hermoine sorry you have to sit by Malfoy."  
"Yea, whatever." Said Hermoine, still fuming. Before Neville could ask what was wrong with her, Ron said,  
"She's just a little angry right now, it would be a very good idea not to go near her right now." Then he added in a whisper, "I think it may that 'time of the month' for her." Hermoine heard that.  
"Ronald Weasley, don't you dare assume anything like that, just because I'm not 'in love' with this seating arrangement, does not mean, on any level, that I'm going through my menstrual cycle!"  
Inquisitive Ron asked, "Well, are you?"  
"Y-yes, but, my anger is NOT being caused by P.M.S. This is just me, angry." Hermoine said uneasily.  
"Then I'd hate to see what you'd look like pissed off with P.M.S." Ron retorted.  
"I'm not sure, but if I was, you'd be lucky if you got through the day with both of you're balls still intact." Said Hermoine very heatedly. At that moment, Ron knew it was time to back off. As he went he mumbled quickly.  
"I-ii'm j-just gon-na go ove-over there now." Hermoine laughed, but anger swept over her face, when she met eyes with her new seat partner. Both threw each other the deepest looks of revulsion.  
Pretty much everyone in the room looked p.o.'ed, and if would have been very difficult for Prof. Mcgonagall not to notice. So she spoke. "Well, welcome to Transfiguration, as you must have notice there is a...slight change in seating..." There was a loud, obvious scoff from the back of the room.  
Hermoine nudged Malfoy and whispered, "Shut it Malfoy."  
Then Mcgonagall continued, "Aah, yes, right, well, because of this... err... situation... we will have 10 min. each day where we'll converse with someone of a different house, and today, you will talk to the person sitting next to you."  
Pansy Parkinson blurted, "Do we have to talk to them for the whole 10 minutes?"  
A sigh came from Prof. Mcgonagall and she said, "Yes, the WHOLE 10 minutes. Now let's get started." _

_ For the first several minutes nothing was said by Hermoine or Malfoy until he finally said, "I can't believe I have to sit by this mudblood, probably the worst of all of them, you aren't fit to wipe my shoes Granger." _

_ "Malfoy, I'm sick of it, every time you see me or Harry or Ron you try to find something about us to insult. I mean it's like you try to be around us all the time. But do you know what I love?" All of a sudden Hermoine leaned toward Malfoy. Malfoy got nervous. "I love when you screw up. Every time that happens, it takes you down off your pedestal and puts you at the same height as every other human. I think you're jealous, every time you jeer at us, it's because you're jealous, you wish you actually had friends, unlike your stupid cronies and Pansy. You just try to make me as miserable as you are, so no one will be able to say that that little 'mudblood' has a better life that rich, popular Draco Malfoy." _

_ Draco kept his mouth shut the rest of Transfiguration. After Transfiguration Harry walked up to Hermoine and asked, "What did you do to Malfoy, he got out of here quick, he looked like he was scared or something." Hermoine had the pleasure of telling Harry and Ron what she said to him. _

_ Ron the first to speak, Harry was still stunned, "Go Hermoine." _

_ "Yea, come on guys, we'll be late for lunch, some people are really getting into S.P.E.W. and I think I can get her to join before next class hour. Ron secretly whispered an 'oh my god' to Harry. _

_ "Look Ron, come on, both you and me know you like Hermoine, hell I wouldn't be surprised if she did too. Why don't you just up to her and tell her how you feel? It would make me feel a whole lot better, and you would stop feeling sorry for yourself." Harry said. _

_ Ron, surprised by the so sudden change in topic spoke, "Harry, I know you're right, but what if she doesn't feel the same way?"_

_ "But what if she does?" _

_ "Good Point."  
  
Later by the Forbidden Forest  
  
"Hermoine, hey what are doing over here?" Ron asked  
"Oh, just a bit of reading."  
"Oh." Ron said as if had been obvious. It was silent between them for a minute or two.  
"Umm... Ron, did you want to talk to me about something?"  
"Wha...? Oh yea! I guess I forgot. Hermoine what do you think of me?"  
"Well, I know you can be smart, at times, you're a great keeper, even though you don't have much confidence, you temper is sometimes higher than it should..."  
"No, not like that, I mean what do you think of ME?"  
"I... guess I don't know what you mean Ron."  
"I... would you like to hang out with me ever?"  
"Yea, I love to. You and Harry are really funny."  
"No I mean just you and me, not Harry."  
"Oh, OH, oh. Well, yea, I guess that would be fun." A warm smile spread over her face, and then Ron's lit up too.  
"So, would it be ok it we went to the Three Broomsticks together on Saturday?" said Ron hopefully.  
Hermoine smiled again and then said, "You know what Ron? I think I would really like that."  
  
_Umm... you can review if you want to. I don't care as long as you've read it.


	3. Curiosity

Alright you guys have to bear with me because I'm a little confused on some of my quidditch parts, I have no idea what year Angela or Katie or Alicia are in, so just bear with me please. Just to make this story how I want it, cause it's my story, Alicia left after the fifth book, but Angela and Katie are in their 7th year now, so that the Gryffindor team needs two beaters and one chaser. Now that we have that settled. On with the show!  
  
Hey what's up? I'm supremely bored at like 12:00 at night, so I'm just writing chapter three ok? Okay, this is the same story as Darkness, Brings Hope I just changed the title.  
  
Pleese dn't hurte mae if eye speel thengs ronge.  
  
Disclaimer: Don't wash platinum shorts. .. . . . . . . . . . . ...... ............. ................. .......... . .. . . . ....

_Ron turned and ran (and what seemed to be danced) back to the castle. Harry was in the Gryffindor common room. Ron immediately ran up to Harry and hugged him. Harry had never seen Ron that happy before.  
After Harry had caught his breath he asked Ron, "So, I'm guessing it went well?"  
"Went well? Are you kidding me, it went great, she's gonna go with me to the Three Broomsticks on Saturday!"  
"Alright Ron."  
"Harry I need your help though."  
"What for? You asked her out all by yourself, what do need me to go with you?"  
Then Ron said, with all seriousness, "No, I-I'm not sure what to wear."  
"Oh my God, Ron." Harry said with a look of pity on his face.  
On Friday, Harry and Ron had quidditch practice; Hermoine was in the stands to cheer them on. Unfortunately, every time Ron glanced at Hermoine, he got distracted from the game. He began looking at her so often that Katy pointed it out to Angela, who made Hermoine watch practice from inside the castle. Ron played much better. After several hours of hard practice, both Harry and Ron wanted nothing better than to sleep right away. Hermoine was already sitting in the common room, finishing her N.E.W.T essay on Ancient Ruins. Harry walked up the stairs to the boys sleeping quarters, knowing that Ron and Hermoine probably wanted to talk.  
"Hi." Ron whispered out of exhaustion.  
"Hi." Hermoine whispered right back. "How was your practice, Ron?"  
"Hard. We had to work on one of Angela's new team formations. She says it's really difficult, but if we can get the alignment right on the left side, then it's sure to work."  
"Oh, ok that's great." Hermoine was glad that they had something to talk about without being nervous, but she really wished it wouldn't have to be about quidditch.  
"Hermoine, maybe I could teach you how to fly sometime?" Ron asked.  
"Umm... I don't know Ron, I mean, I've never really been partial to flying."  
"Oh, well that's okay, but maybe, if you want to, I could take you on a ride sometime?"  
There was a pause. "Well, Okay, but I don't want to go up there alone. You know that I really don't like heights."  
"Yea, Hermoine I know. Listen, are you going to be down here for awhile, because I could stay if you wanted me to."  
"Oh, no Ron. I'm just about finished up. And I know you're tired, you just played quidditch, for 6 hours straight. And anyways, I need some time alone to write the conclusion of my essay."  
Ron didn't even bother contradicting her. He was tired, and wanted almost nothing better than to sleep for a good 10 hours. He smiled at her and walked up the stairs.  
The next day Ron woke up at 9:00. Harry and Hermoine must have already gone down to breakfast because Harry's bed was empty and Hermoine wasn't in the common room doing homework. Ron had butterflies in his stomach. He had never been so nervous before. He walked down to the Great Hall, wondering what he and Hermoine would talk about while at the Three Broomsticks. He knew he probably shouldn't talk about quidditch because he did know that quidditch wasn't a subject that Hermoine was preferable to. He supposed he could talk about school, but he knew that he didn't like that subject much. For him there was no obvious subject that they could talk about without boring the other one to death while doing so. He guessed he would just have to wing it._

_ Harry and Hermoine were sitting next to Ginny, Dean, and Neville. As Ron walked toward them, he felt a slight twinge of anger towards Dean. Dean had been Ginny's boyfriend since the end of her fourth year. (A/n: she's one year younger than Ron.) "Hi guys!" Ron said with a loud, happy voice._

_ Both Harry and Hermoine responded with, "Hi Ron."_

_ Then Hermoine spoke, "Ginny was just telling us how Dean is going to try out for a beater on the Gryffindor quidditch team."_

_ Ron had completely forgot, Fred and George had left Hogwarts; The Gryffindor quidditch team was down two beaters. He wondered about how their business was doing at Weasley's Wizarding Wheezes. He new they must have turned some kind of profit in Ron fifth year because they showed up last summer to greet him after his Hogwart's semester in dragon skin suits._

_ Dean interrupted Ron thoughts, "Well, hopefully I'll do well at the tryouts, I mean there's no way I could out do the twins legacy as beaters, but I'll try to play well if I'm chosen as a beater._

_ Then Ginny said, "Dean calm down, it sounds like you're trying to write an application. Just go to the tryouts and try your best." Ginny gave him a small peck on the cheek. Ron flinched only a little._

_ "You right, Gin. Okay, I'll see you guys later. I have to go to the library to work on my potions essay."_

_ Only Harry and Ron heard Hermoine mumble, "You haven't finished that yet?" Both Ron and Harry smiled._

_ Finally Ron asked Ginny, "Are you really still going out with him?"_

_ "It would seem so, wouldn't it Ron?"_

_ "Yea, but why are you still dating him? I mean he doesn't even seem like your type."_

_ Ginny answered coldly, "Well, you would know my type, wouldn't you? Being my brother and all. Why don't you just get a life of you own, so you won't have to worry about butting into mine all the time." Ginny walked off angrily, leaving her brother to stare at her in amazement._

_ "He really isn't her type. And did you hear him; he called her 'Gin'. What's that supposed to mean?" said an angry Ron._

_ Then Harry said, "Well, I'm guessing it has something to do with being a nickname for her. Because, you know, 'Gin' is probably short for Ginny." At this response, Neville snorted in his oatmeal. Hermoine frowned._

_ All Ron could think of to say was, "Whatever." He walked away guilty. He headed toward the Gryffindor common room; he thought that maybe Ginny was there. He could apologize to her then. He truly doubted if he would apologize, because apologies definitely weren't his favorite things to do. He remembered when in the third year, he kept one of the longest grudges towards Hermoine because he thought her cat ate his rat, which it hadn't._

_ He began to think about quidditch again and wondered if Dean was good enough to become a team beater, he had never seen Dean play, so he had no idea if he was good or not. Ron couldn't believe he had forgotten about team tryouts, he was sure Angela had told the team about them hundreds of times, but he was betting his mind had been on Hermoine each time instead. Angela said that all team members were required to be at the team tryouts. The tryouts were going to be on Saturday night; Ron secretly hoped that Dean wouldn't make the team. The thought of having his little sister's boyfriend on the same team as him, pretty much pissed him off._

_ Harry had kept his promise and helped Ron decide what to wear for the "date." Ron was pretty sure Harry was only helping him because he was having trouble putting his hands in the right holes in his shirt. "Oh my God, Ron. You're kind of pathetic. Are you sure you want to go on this date? You know, I think Hermoine is having doubts about this. Once you left she stood up and said something like her wanting to go talk to Mcgonagall about something. I think she was lying though."_

_ Ron answered hopefully, "Well, maybe she's nervous too. Or maybe she just wanted to make an excuse about leaving early to get ready." Ron sat down on his bed once fully dressed with arms in the proper holes._

_ At 12:00, Ron sat in the Gryffindor common room waiting for Hermoine. Hermoine slowly walked down the girl's dormitory's stairs. Ron stood up once he saw her. She was wearing simple weekend clothing, but Ron still thought she looked more beautiful than ever._

_ They walked all the way to the Three Broomstick holding hands. Many of their friends saw them together, some smiled, some looked confused, and some nudged Ron on the shoulder and whispered, "About time."_

_ They walked past the Quidditch supplies shop, where Harry and Shaemus Finnegan were looking at cleaning sets for broomsticks. Harry stopped and waved, then Shaemus looked up at Ron and Hermoine and nodded his head. They walked past Honeydukes, which smelled of chocolate and peppermint. Hermoine shut her eyes and inhaled the smell. She bumped right into someone. She started to mutter 'sorry', but stopped. She had bumped into Draco Malfoy._

_ For a moment he looked angry, then he looked at Hermoine and Ron together, still holding hands. He smirked. "Nice to see you to, Granger." He turn to Ron and nodded his head as acknowledgement. "Weasel." Hermoine just stared at Malfoy. Malfoy's smirk faded slightly. He crooked his index finger toward Crabbe and Goyle, who were standing behind him, overshadowing him. They left quickly._

_ Ron looked at Hermoine and then asked. "What do you think that was about?" Hermoine shrugged and looked angry. Ron wasn't quite sure he believed her. He'd have to find out more about that later._

Ok now I want you to review please do so. I don't care if their flames.


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